Thursday, September 11, 2014

Let's Coffee Date :: ThredUp

Wanna go on a coffee date today?  I'm inviting you to join me.  We're going to Romolo's (trust me on this), and here's how its going down.  

First, we'll plan on 9A, but then I'll text you at 8:57 when you're sitting in the parking lot and it'll read "Leaving now, little late".  Unless we're besties, in which case it'll just read "Magagnotti Time" which means the same thing.  But I'll get there and then we'll order after hugging it out (I am a bit of a hugger, once you know me.  Consider yourself warned.  That is, unless I get a really strong "I'm not a hugger" vibe off of you, in which case I respect your boundaries until after the first bottle of wine.  Just sayin'.).  You'll go first, early bird and all that, and you'll probably order an actual coffee with some shot of syrup or whatever because you're a real grown up and then I'll step up and get a half-coffee half-chocolate because I'm a fake grown up.  I do not apologize for this.  We could order pastries too, except they don't really have them, but the hot coffalatte is so delicious that I don't want for anything more.  If you think you might, pack a Clif bar.

So anyhow, we get our drinks, and sit down on the bright red leather couch, because we're friends, see, and friends don't sit at tables to hang out unless there are dishes to eat off of or diagrams to consider.  Sometimes there are diagrams.  Don't judge.  Anyhow, we couch it up and then we chat.  I tell you about moving and Handsome's love/hate with his job and how when we told RG to eat her chicken, she made "the sound the chicken makes" except it sounded like a bear going "bawk bawk" and I laughed so hard, she's fabulous.  And you can tell me things too, because I've got to take a in order to properly sip my drink, and you get the floor.

So what do you tell me?  No really, whats going on with you, fraynd?

I also want to say, on this coffee date, that if you notice that my jeans are adorbs, or that my shirt seems new, you might get me started on a tangent and then you won't get to pipe up until I'm done.  Because yo - I've got a new crush, and its on ThredUp.

I love cute packaging.
They don't have to do it, but its just a little something extra, just for kicks.

You know about my addiction hobby called "online shopping" (long "o").   You're also aware that I don't enjoy malls, hate not finding things after putting in the effort, and have a very low measure for what I think clothing should cost - we agree on this last part, as $120 for jeans is RIDIC.  We've also talked about that whole conscience issue with ethically produced clothing and waste and the environment and... basically, how I overthink all of the fun out of clothes shopping most of the time and sometimes make you overthink and how you hate me a little bit for it.

But then I surprise you with one of Romolo's chocolate covered strawberries and we're good again.

So after you throw out an innocent comment about some article of clothing I am wearing and I am set loose to jabber on about my new favorite online store, here's what I tell you:

I love ThredUp because...

1) I can shop at home in the evenings when RG is in bed and I don't have to worry about naptimes or babysitters or wearing pants, etc.  (I don't worry about me wearing pants.  All babysitters must wear pants.)

2) The shipping is free provided you spend over $50.  If you spend less, its something like $3 for the first item and $1 for each item after.  Basically, you're charged for the actual amount it costs to ship stuff.  And returns?  Well, I'm sending some stuff back this week - FOR FREE.  This is the holy grail of online shopping, my dears.  Of course, I'm sending stuff back because I ordered 12 pairs of jeans last week, because I have a hard time finding stuff that fits, and maybe I got a little carried away... But you don't judge me because, duh, the strawberry!

3) Variety variety variety! You know how I hate having to go to all of the stores to see all of the different brands, and you hate it too.  So when I tell you that ThredUp lets you choose the brands you want to see, filter them by size, and only look for the pieces you're looking for, well, you think you might love them too.

And then, then I drop the bomb on you.  I tell you that I do solemnly swear that all appropriately washed clothing purchased from ThredUp will not shrink, but you don't believe me.  You think the obscene number of chocolate covered strawberries I've been consuming (declaring them "breakfast fruit) has gone to my head.  But then I tell you the secret - your clothes won't shrink, because they've all already been washed.  

That's right!  ThredUp is an online consignment-ish store.  You can buy new to like-new clothing and the quality is superb!  And the prices, mylanta, they're fabulous.  Citizen of Humanity (Anthro brand) jeans for under $40.  Gap jeans, look like new, $14.49.  Even all sorts of brands that I'm not cool enough to know about, I can happen upon them and fall in love, all for up to 80% off of retail.

As you finish your coffee and chocolate-covered blueberries (they're organic, its okay!), you tell me that you'd prefer to wear new clothes.  And I tell you, they look like new.  Maybe as though you've owned them for a month, worn them twice.  You can do like I do and just pretend you lost them in your closet and just now re-found them.  As I was trying some on, Handsome asked "So, how are these 'used' when they're new..." because he thought they were new... even though they're not!

So now you're hooked, high on caffeine and a sugar buzz, and you want to go shop for some of these barely-used clothes, too.  It is at this point that I make you swear to wait until I email you, because if you use the link I send you, you'll get $10 off any purchase, and so will I.  And then I'll suggest that you use the coupon code SAVE20 to get an extra 20% off of your order, because *MWAH* I just love you so much.  And then, then, if you find you like them and want to order again later (or for your children, because they've got the cutest children's clothes), I tell you to go through ebates, because then you'll get 7.5% back with every order, using my link or not.

Whew.  Aren't you glad you liked my jeans?  And ate some strawberries with me?  And sipped the coffee and sat on the red couch and just chilled, even though I was running late?  
<3 M.
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