So, WW has these things called activity points. And activity points are earned by doing activities (duh), and you can use them to track the points (aka- food amount) that you eat.
To give some perspective to those of you oblivious of this whole system, walking briskly for 30 minutes will give me 2 points. Eating 16 Wheat Thins, Low Fat, will cost me 4 points.
So anyhow, I like to eat, as you may have noticed. This motivates me to get Activity points for myself as much as I can. Cooking? Goes under "Light Housework", 1 point per 15 minutes. Walking to class? Yep, I count that. This system has gotten Dukas quite a bit more exercise, as I try to get more walks in. Handsome thinks I'm over-reaching, but I say I'm just sticking with the plan...
Lately, I've been struggling with... I guess you'd call it Wifery. People always tell you (or at least they should) that "marriage is hard work". And the young lovers in love shake their heads and say "Oh, yes, we know, we're ready for it". I especially thought this. See, handsome and I had dated for nearly 5 years (per an ultimatum) before getting engaged.
We had gotten to know each other slowly, as friends first. Spent a lot of time with each others families, built upon a foundation of mutual respect and shared interests... blah blah blah.
When it came down to it, all of that still adds up to woefully unprepared. Because, I've found, that marriage, if you're doing it right, requires a person to put the needs of the other above their own. "AND WHO THE CRAP WANTS TO DO THAT?" is my reaction, most of the time. Its a weird *warning: mathy term* inverse relationship, where the more you give, the more you end up getting. Which is fine as a rule, and risky-feeling in practice.
Anyhow, I've been feeling kind of mouthy lately. Which is bad even when coupled with my general emotions, and lately I've been feeling sleep-deprived-emotions. Finally, to make it the perfect storm, I've got to watch what I'm eating because of those stupid points I talked about above. I'm being honest here; I've got a bag full of no-bakes sitting on my counter, and all I want to do is Go To Town on that. Warm them in the microwave, get a nice tall glass of milk... s'cuse me, I'll be right back after I GORGE myself...
~ Time Passes ~
Ok, I'm back. So anyhow, last night, I was feeling things again. Pretty strongly this time. And oh, I just wanted to call up Handsome (because he was on shift) and just unload. Tell him all that I was feeling right then and there. The feelings, oh and were they ever strong ones, were a combination of pent-up frustration, poor sleep, and a hectic schedule. Then, what should happen, but Handsome calls me. Like lighting a pipe while pumping gas... sooo ripe for danger.
However, while Handsome talked to me and we conversed,
I held God held my tongue back and I did not unload on him. But let me tell you, it was hard. Like higher than a diamond on the Mohs Scale, H-A-R-D hard. No lie, I was almost sweating, wrestling with all of these emotions, praying for wisdom, waiting for answers to all of these feelings. And all I could think, while in the conversation and then in emotional throes afterwards, was "I should be getting activity points for this". Any one see a hint that I may have been... I don't know, being Ridiculous?
Today, time has passed. I've slept and even gotten in a nap today. Handsome and I have spent time together, talking and just hanging out. My emotions are completely calmed, and I don't want to say any of those things that I wanted to say last night. Heck, I don't even remember half of them. I suppose God has answered my questions with this peace that makes no sense in light of the lack of change. But peace I have, and believe me, the whole household is grateful.
I'm not sure where I was going with this post. Maybe this means something to you. I know I've learned some stuff this weekend, developed some character, some discipline and fortitude, and learned even more about wifery and relying on God's wisdom & timing.
And finally, as a cap on the weekend, as I sit here typing this President Obama is preparing to make an announcement regarding Osama Bin Laden's demise.
Its been quite a weekend.
Recovering from recreation,