Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Not a Tutorial

I love my Jeep.  I do.  I've said this before, it isn't the vehicle that I would have picked; Handsome picked it for me.  And I'm so glad he did.  It's great in the winter, what with the four-wheel-drive (4WD) and all that.  Summer, however, is when it really shines.  

This is the life, people.  When I see the stickers that say, "It's a Jeep Thing" well, I still don't quite understand that.  But I know why they wanted to put it on there.  Because, on any given day, whenever they want to, they too can drive around with this here view.  It's fabulous.  Give me a call, we'll go for a ride & I'll make a believer out of you.

I had an unexpected trip come up, and Handsome informed me that I would need to change my oil before I could go.  Let me note here that I like working on my vehicles, to an extent.  I can change the oil.  I can rotate the tires.  I can check the fluids and jump a battery and call AAA with the best of them.  I owe it all to a fiercely stubborn streak I picked up in highschool (one word, I swear it should be) and to men in my life who took time to explain and teach.

However, Handsome seemed to be setting me up in this situation.  Examine the facts before you, and decide for yourselves whether he wanted me to succeed or fail.
Fact 1:  It was 8:30 PM before we started 
Fact 2:  He did not allow me in the dry carport (for fear of staining the cement)
Fact 3:  He gave me only an empty pizza box to protect my back from the wet driveway (it was misting, had been raining all day) and a maglite to see by
Fact 4:  He gave me an oil collection pan with a hole the size of a pop can
Fact 5:  He did not let me use the jack to lift the Jeep, as it is technically tall enough for me to shimmy under without raising
My original idea was to post a tutorial about how to change your oil.  I know a lot of women don't do it, but it's not that difficult, and I thought it would be helpful.  Since I felt pretty proficient at the task, I didn't think I'd have any trouble.  However, since Handsome orchestrated the whole thing, it went a little differently than I had anticipated.

The Good News:  My oil is changed, and I did it.

The Not-so-Good News:  My hair decided to collect all of the used oil that spilled out of the tank and missed the collection pan.

It took 3 washes with regular shampoo, and 7 'bouts with Dawn Dishsoap (yes, like those poor oil-crused ducks and otters) before the suds came out clear.  I woke up this morning, still smelling like motor oil.  Then I went to a fancy business meeting, still smelling like motor oil.  Because I'm a class act, people.  I considered spraying my head with perfume, but decided against it.  When you try to cover up one smell with another, you always run the risk of the two smells mixing and smelling worse than the original.  Let's just say it didn't feel like my lucky day.

I'm gonna be a diesel mechanic,


  1. You should have paid him back by sleeping on his pillows ;) Only fitting lol

    1. See, now, that's clever. Perhaps then he wouldn't have been laughing all doubled over, near to crying. I like your style!

      <3 Mariah


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