Tuesday, August 7, 2012

A Bag of Frozen Popcorn Chicken

I know I said I wasn't gonna be back here until my travels were done. But do you know how long a two week blogging break really is?  I haven't had it professionally measured, but I'm pretty sure its somewhere between infinity and forever.

That's not why I'm breaking this fast early though (and I don't mean "fast" in the religious sense, more I'm the breakfast sort of way, lest you judge).  No, wild horse could not have pulled me back, no way; it took an act of God.  And by "act of God," I'm talking about a bag of frozen popcorn chicken.


Without further ado, here's the story I had to come back to share with you...

I've been picking up my neighbors' mail for them for about 4 months now, since they've been dead out of town.  More on that later. Anyhow, tonight, on my way to their mailbox, I was chatting with me madre on the phone when I spied something in the road.  She's telling a story, so I don't interrupt, just pick up the something, grab the mail, and walk back to my house.  

As we get back to my house, I say, "Mom, guess what I'm holding in my hand?  It's a bag of..." and then she cuts me off and says "No, no, I want to guess.  Did you say it's a bag of something?  Say it again, you already let that part out."  So I say, "Yes, I said 'its a bag of...'"  And I about gave her a hint.  I did.  I almost at least told her how improbable it would be for her to guess.  But I didn't.  I didn't tell her anything else.  Because as I was holding what is in that picture above, my mother, 654 miles away, says "Uhm... A bag of frozen popcorn chicken!"

I'm not lying.   Sometimes I fib, but this is straight verbatim.  This happened.  To me.  Tonight.

I freaked out, obviously.  I demanded to know if she was in SC.  I accused her of using military satellites (or at least google earth) to spy on me.  She denied it all.  She had no explanation.  She then incorrectly guessed me as wearing a gray shirt (red), and although she could tell me what color Duke was, I don't think that actually counts.

All the same, it happened.  The world held still and the space-time continuum was breached.   Basically, she hacked my life, and I don't know how.  I guess that's just the type of bond we have.

And that's what I had to come back here to tell you.  I mean, how could I not share that with you?!?  Now I'm going back on break.  My next (and final, hallelujah!) trip starts at 4:30 in the AM tomorrow.  But then that's it.  After that, life as usual will resume.  I love life as usual.

I'm out,
TFW

6 comments:

  1. I've some strange things in my time, but I think that one has to take the cake!

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    Replies
    1. Isn't it nuts?? I was 100% freaked out.

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  2. It's true. She is not lying. I can't explain it. Short of some sort of genetic accident or divine intervention, this story could not be truthfully told. Freaked me right out. And,also gave me some insight into how much I don't know about the universe in which I live. What I do know...Mariah and I? Same person. Now I have proof.

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    Replies
    1. I really just... I don't even know...

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  3. I had to read a follow-up post after the Feb. linkup. Wow. That's crazy and awesome. Yay for your mom.

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